funny story

Rick and I were coming home from North Liberty this afternoon,driving on interstate 80 with the windows down and the wonderful 74 degree temps blowing through out his truck.

Anyway he looks at me and says “Let’s go to Daytona”
I laughed and said “Daytona Beach? Now?
He said “Sure why not, we are on the road…..let’s just keep on driving”
I laughed and said, “What about money, clothes…..telling the kids?”
He just grinned.
And then I said “Besides it is very hot in Florida right now”
He said “Yeah but I bet the ocean is nice and warm”

And this is a funny story because in less then a month, for his birthday he and I are flying to Daytona Beach for a few days.
He doesn’t know it yet, and I am going to not tell him until the weekend before we go.
But I’ve questioned the decision to vacation there almost since the minute I hit the send buttom to pay for the vacation.
Questioned it because he hates hot and humid weather and that is what Florida is right now.
But to have him say today, “Let’s go to Daytona” makes me smile and think “How neat, that I know him that well”

age

I’m 46 years old and I’m feeling every bit of it today due to moving my sister

it is sad to me how the body just starts giving out, or wears out.

I have young kids and I tell them, take care of yourself now, at 18, 21, 26, and 28 because once you hit 40 or 43 or so…the body just starts to wear down.

Isn’t hindsight a wonderful thing?
if only I had known these things then.
I would have taken alot better care of myself then I have been.

Age, brings wisdom but it also brings aches and pains and an older body to live with.

hi sis

hello Kathy,

you owe me an email and I haven’t heard from you since very early on Thursday morning.
What gives?
you need to write.
Love Marge

P.S.  I love your blogs

moving

I have moved myself and my family so much over the years that I can say I’ve become quite a moving expert.
I hate moving myself and I hate moving others however because the family has no males to speak of, except my husband, we usually get to help moving because of Rick and that he owns a truck.

so anyway today we moved my oldest sister and while exhausting I was glad to do it too because she had no one else to help her.
She even paid us for helping and while we tried to argue and tell her no, she isn’t one to be told no to

 She has a horrible mess to deal with at her place and I felt guilty leaving her with all of that mess, but she also seemed to want to do it at her own speed.

Family is the most important thing in this world and I love mine dearly, but I will be happy when we are all settled and no one wants to move anymore.

money

oh that wonderful green stuff that I can never seem to have enough of.
Granted I know I am not alone in this need for money or lack of.
I am one of seven children and I know all my family struggle with their own money woes.
Still I can’t seem to get a head and something else comes up and takes the very small savings I had begun.
Working two jobs seems to be too hard on my body because I keep hurting myself when I work more then a fourty hour week.
And yet still there isn’t enough money to go around.
Too many bills and not enough money.
Ugh.
Why can’t life be simplier?
Why does money have to rule everything?

dept is a depressing thing.

what is this all about?

Alright, I was feeling quite fat and disgusted with myself over the weekend last weekend….and I told myself come Monday morning I was going to get back on the diet plan and keep going with it, after all Rick and I will be in Florida where bathing suits and shorts will be our normal attire.
However around ten am on Monday, I got so hungry that I felt faint and I automatically began stuffing my face and haven’t stopped since then

NOW I ask you, what is wrong with me?
Why do I stuff myself so full that I’m miserable and can’t stand myself?
It is like I set myself up every dang time.
I just don’t get it.

I feel so much better when I am thinner and eating right.
SO why do I sabotoge myself?

If I lose a bit of weight and someone notices and compliments me on it, I automatically start eating more and gaining all I lost back.

Why do I do this?
I haven’t a clue.

I know they say food is a comfort, and I do believe that
But knowing I like myself thinner, like feeling healthier and have more energy when I’m thinner then why do I sabotoge myself time and time again?

 I haven’t a clue.
So someone out there please tell me what is this all about?
Because I’m clueless why I keep doing this to myself.

wedding in the air

well my youngest son and his girlfriend/fiance’  told us this evening that they plan on getting married in the next week or two.
Just a justice of the peace and no reception because her sister is getting married in October and she doesn’t want to take any of her glory away.
She says that they will have a big reception a year or so from now.
NOW mind you I’m the mother of the groom, but who is going to care, or even want to attend a reception after the fact a year from now?
I mean I will because I’m his mother but anyone else?
It is questionable.
I would like them to have the reception now after the wedding even if it is only a DJ and a picnic of sorts.

Between Rick and I and her parents it shouldn’t cost all that much?
And I want to say something to them, to her specifically because I’m thinking it is her show for the most part, but then I’m afraid of stepping on her toes and or offending her.

So…what to do?
Let them do it this way, or suggest something more?
?????

Rick

He is a man who believes things are black and white.
He believes that nothing is more important then providing for his family and being a good honest man.
He is a loving man although he does occasionally forget to express this.
He is a hard worker and doesn’t have much patience for those who try to cheat the system to get ahead.

He can be a hot head.
He can be stubborn.
He can be ornery

He can be angry and sometimes hateful

He can be loving and have a soft heart and even be emotional once and a while

He makes me want to be a better person

His children think the world of him and I would have to say at least three of the four of them actually favor him over me.
He is all that is good and honest and true

And I know I am a very lucky woman to be his wife.

depression and suicide

Another subject I know very little about.
The subject of depression.
I have had my bouts with depression and once or twice I think fleetingly that suicide might be an answer.
But it is a thought that comes and instantly leaves me.

I have sisters who have fought with depression and one who has even attempted to kill herself several times.
Thank God she has never succeeded.

I have two of my own children who have been so depressed that they think suicide is the answer.
My oldest child has even tried once or twice.

Luckily for me and our family she never succeeded either.

What is attempted suicide, but a cry for help?
A plea for someone to notice that they are in pain and need help to over come these feelings of needing to harm themselves.

I know a boy, not really well, but he was a friend of my daughters who did succeed in killing himself 17 months ago.
He was a handsome boy and one I had known of, for about twelve years.
It broke my heart and I think of him still to this day, and wish there had been a way to prevent him from ending his life.
He was a handsome boy, all of sixteen, but he felt alone and unable to deal with life by himself so he chose to end his life.
Yes drugs played a part in it all, but even without the drugs he was an unhappy boy.

I don’t understand it, the need to harm myself or even to want to end my life.
I mean I have days that I am down and unhappy but not to the point that I want to end my life.
Maybe I am lucky in that way.
I look at all of my blessings.
My husband, my children, my grandchildren………..my health, my families health…..my ability to work and hold down a job……..the sun shining every day…..every little thing that makes life as pretty as it is.

The birds, the flowers, the green grass……

life is pretty good and I wish I could help those who don’t see it the way I do.

I’m not riding a high horse

I may come across as holier then thou.
That isn’t my intention nor do I ever want to come across like I know it all.
I don’t.
I just know I write from the heart and things that bother me or touch me in a way that I can’t get past and need to vent or write about.

so please don’t think I’m on a high horse judging people.
I’m not.
It just is heartbreaking to see so many people doing wrong and having no one to help them out.